GOOD NEWS, EVERYBODY!

I have an extra-special Lunasa present for some of you! I've gotten permission from Commander Edgeworth to start up a hand-to-hand combat training program, for those among the crew less able to defend themselves!

If the course is for you, then you should have already received one of my special, custom-made, perfectly streamlined jumpsuits as a Lunasa gift! If you got one, then I look forward to seeing you! That means you too, Miss Greta!

Anyone who wants to come is welcome, of course! I have extra jumpsuits for you, too, so don't be shy!

[Filtered to Anko]

Happy Lunasa, Anko! Are you enjoying the present I sent you?

This...this is horrible. I don't know who...why...

I'm sorry. I don't know what to say.

[Filtered to Sasuke and Greta]

If you need to talk to someone about this, you know where to find me.

MY VOOOOOOOOOICE!

MY VOICE IS BACK! OH HAPPY DAYS! JOY JOY JOY!

Damn, there's some sort of magic keeping me from speaking! This is completely cramping my style!

I've taken out three of them down in the cargo hold! If anyone needs help let me know, I'll be there in a flash!

Hey, Mitarashi!

Guess who I ran into!

I love you!

You, the youthful individual listening to this post!

I love you deeply and personally, even though we have never met! You are a wonderful person and whatever you do, you do it wonderfully! I would give you a hug, but...wait, hang on a moment...

sound of the journal being moved around, the microphone rubbing up against fabric*

There! You can now consider yourself officially hugged! GO FORTH AND BE YOUTHFUL!

It has come to my attention that this ship is not yet sufficiently FESTIVE! What a travesty! Are there any youthful volunteers out there to help me deck the halls properly?

*snorting sound in the background, also some property damage*

My goodness, you certainly are an energetic little fellow!

Does anyone know where this fine creature came from? I was under the impression that pets were not allowed on board. He certainly seems to like me, though--

*crashing sound as Gai is knocked to the floor*

Haha, stop that! You'll lick the youth right off of me!

*muffled, in the background:*

I hope that I have secured my post correctly this time! If I have not, I'll do a hundred chin-ups off of the edge of the deck.

*louder:*
Gooooooood morning, Melior! I was feeling somewhat restless when I woke up this morning, and so I am about to engage in my daily routine of calisthenics! Would anyone care to join me?

*sound of someone tapping the microphone*

Is this thing on? Oh? Is that what this red light means? It's not very clear, I still need to-

*various tumbling noises, sound of thing being adjusted, bizarrely enough the sound of a donkey*

Right! I think I've got this now!

Ahem! This is Lieutenant Gai, reporting in a youthful manner from the docks in Melior, with an important message for Admiral von Karma of the Victoria II! Can anyone out there hear me?

( Sweat, baby, sweat, baby )